Three dogs and an alarm system
by Rick Watson
Jan 22, 2011 | 1660 views | 0 0 comments | 23 23 recommendations | email to a friend | print
Rick Watson
Rick Watson
A while back we began having issues with our home security system and I had several conversations with the company that monitors our alarms. I replaced some of the sensors on the doors and windows that had stopped working and the backup battery.

Those repairs helped, but our alarm kept tripping and I had a gut feeling I knew why.

When we fenced in our back yard some time ago, we installed a doggy door into our house. Although the mutts spend much of their time outside, especially when the weather is nice, they are free to come and go as they please.

When we’ve been away and drive into the yard, you can hear all the dogs yapping a canine choral number from inside the backyard fence.

Once we get out of the car and head into the house, all the dogs compete to be the first one at the front door when we come in. You can hear them knocking each other around as they all try to go through the doggie door at once.

I’m not sure what they do while we’re away but I suspect they come inside and wander through the house foraging for crumbs of food that we may have dropped during meals.

Everybody who visits our home, makes fun of our dogs. They say things like — My, your dogs are “well fed,” which is the kindest thing said.

Another friend told us we needed to install a beeper on Taylor’s rear end, to warn pedestrians when she’s backing up. She’s part bulldog and in all honesty, she does weigh almost as much as a Honda Civic. Our great-nephew Jordan who is 3, didn’t mince words when he said “Aunt Rick, your dogs are fat!”

When compared to the large dogs, Ol’ Buddy and Charlie are not that big. But our oldest dog, Bear, tips the scales at a hundred and four pounds. We have another Labrador, Doberman and Weimaraner mix that is the runt of the big dog crew and weighs about eighty-five pounds. He actually looks like a small thoroughbred horse when he runs.

We could almost feed a third world country for what we spend on dog food each month.

At any rate, during one of my conversations with the security company, I spoke with a lady that sounded just like the comedian Wanda Sykes.

I told her I thought our dogs were tripping our alarm. “How big are the dogs,” she asked. I said we had two that were about a hundred pounds and one that weighted right at ninety.

She blurted, “You got three dogs in your house bigger than me, no wonder you’re alarm’s tripping! What on earth do you need an alarm for?” Her voice inflections and timing made it sound just like you’d hear in a comedy routine.

I’m sure some customers would have been upset if she’d cracked on their dogs like she did on ours, but it struck me funny and I almost spewed coffee into the phone receiver.

I’m not sure if her boss was within earshot or what, but she covered her mouthpiece and relayed the conversation to someone and when she came back on the line, there was no mirth in her voice.

After a few more minutes, she gave me some options for system upgrades that would let the dogs and the alarm coexist without accidentally bringing carloads of armed policemen to our quite neighborhood.

I hope the lady didn’t get into any trouble for being so blunt, because I was amused by her honest response.